Over time I have had many people ask me this question "We are told that love in the home is as important as it gets...but I find that I do not know HOW TO DO IT sometimes...can you give me some suggestions on how to express love in the family and the home?"

President Gordon B Hinckley said, in 1985) "It is not an easy thing to be a parent.  There is so much of frustration, so much of worry, so much of blighted dreams and broken hopes for so very many.  I recognize, of course, that there are many homes where this is not the case, where things go smoothly, and well, where there are never raised angry voices, where there are parents who are happy and calm, and children who are faithful and grow up without serious problems.  If such be your home, be grateful....

But I assure you that there are many of the other kind, for I have received letters concerning them---letters from parents and letters from sons and daughters.  It is very easy to say that if we will do this or that, all will go well.  But I have seen conscientious men and women, people who are faithful and true, people who try to observe the teachings of the Church, who still experience broken hearts over the conduct of their children.
I know some of the answers to these problems, but I confess I do not know all of them.  Many of the problems are of our own making.  In other cases, they seem to happen notwithstanding all that we do to guard against them.,,,,,to any within the sound of my voice who have have such sons and daughters, may I suggest that you never quit trying.  They are never lost until you have given up.  Remember that it is love, more than any other thing, that will bring them back......"

Back now to the question asked of me in the first paragraph above.............these are some specific actions you can take in the spirit of building strength within your family.

1.  Write a child a love letter and mail it to them (no matter their age---5, 15, 35, 50).  Getting it in the mail adds something unique and special for your sons and daughters. Put it in an envelope, put a stamp on it and mail it to one of them in particular.

2.  Call one (or more) on their cel phone (if they are old enough to have one) and just say you are checking in, wondering how their day is going, and you just wanted to say "I love you".

3.  Get down on the living room or family room carpet and wrestle with all of them all at once,
Remember to lose the battle............
4.  Play a game with one or two of them.

5.  Take one to the store with you....and just talk about "stuff"

6.  Ask your son or daughter to teach YOU how to do something and then thank them for what they taught you.

7.  Read the scriptures with just one at a time..or maybe two.

8.  Go visit someone sick or lonely and take one or two of your children with you. Then talk afterwards about what happened and why it was important to do it.

9. If you are away on a trip, send them a candy bar in the mail...that's right..mail it to them.  They will love it and remember that it was a family tradition.

10.  Somehow and in some way COMMIT yourselves to spend some time EVERY DAY at the kitchen table eating dinner, a late night snack, reading together, chatting about the events of the day...but do it AT THE TABLE so you can see each other, pay attention to each other, and remember  you ARE A FAMILY.

OK--you can think of many similar things that are from your own creative mind. What is the common denominator here in all of these?  THE PARENT IS DOING SOMETHING DIRECTLY, REGULARLY, AND PERSONALLY WITH HIS OR HER CHILDREN IN VERY SMALL GROUPS OR, IF POSSIBLE, WITH ONE AT A TIME.

This investment is worth it...believe me...do it for a few months and then ask some of the children if they noticed anything different in the family.....listen carefully to what they say and how they say it.

THE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS HAPPEN IN THE FAMILY (HOME).  Jim MacArthur