The essence, the "core" of a person is what endures.  In our modern western world we have learned to fascinate ourselves with things in the short run...the temporary term of things.  And it is bringing us down in a tragic way.  Thus our obsession with food, sex, the body, pleasure, and that the "ends justify the means"....the ends justify the means as long as we "get what we want in the short run".
We have become a society in love with THE TEMPORARY...and due to that we have become a society of addiction. Why?  Because the essence of living in the "short run" REQUIRES  that we refill over and over, and very quickly, whatever we have chosen to "carry in our buckets".  Think about that...what do you carry in your bucket that has to be replaced quickly and over and over again?

Food?  Sex?  Pleasure?  Drugs?  Fame? Power?  Maintaining your grievances?  Control?  Having it "your way"?  Anger?  Selfishness?  Protecting your "secrets"?  Being right?  Competing for attention? Punishing others for hurting you?  Beauty?

OK--now I KNOW some of you reading this are looking at my list (and it could be tons longer) and you are justifying some or all of the things on my list.  In and of themselves..many of them are justifiable.  I agree.  But that is not my point.  My point is that we can be owned by each of them and then they begin to control us, own us...drive us to seek them insatiably.  If that is not happening in your life with any of these--then I pronounce you HEALTHY. :) 
But, in my 40 years of being a psychologist and working with people who are struggling to stay on top of their lives...I have seen that such temporary things, like those on my list above, often begin to define us and own us.  They take control of our lives.  That is not good. We should change that if it is occurring as it affects us and the members of our family and friends around us.

So, what IS the TRUE CORE of an emotionally healthy person?  It is their CHARACTER.  In the center of their being, their soul....they will find, carefully tucked away some very powerful, beautiful and ENDURING personal characteristics that can be the core of who they are. And the beauty of such a view of the emotionally healthy person is that their character can ENDURE.  It is not temporary and it does not control and drive them.....
As they discover it, feed it, develop it.....a calm comes over them...they sense something enduring and permanent inside of them...they realize they do not need the short-term quick fixes that so easily stimulate them....the short term "fixes" they must pay attention to in every moment...or they do not "feel good." 

Short term fixes that are in our bucket require us to always be checking to see if enough of our fix is in the bucket.  We panic if we do not regularly have enough of them.  Think about that versus the calm, enduring, permanency-laden CHARACTER of a person.  It was with you before you were born, and it can be with you all during your mortal life if you choose to acknowledge it...and it will go with you into eternity.  The other stuff just fools you, takes ownership of you, cheats you, and as you get older, leaves you empty and feeling that you deceived yourself.

Think about it.  Intriguing new ideas for some....a good reminder for others.....have a nice day. Jim