I have a few followers of my blog so I do not want you to return to it day after day looking for an additional blog...I have made (including this one) 130 posts..a few people have found them interesting but I have concluded that the interest is not sufficient to warrant continuing so this will be my last post.  I only say that so you will not be looking for others. If you have found any of the posts interesting I suggest you reread some of the old ones as there are 130 of them.  Each one follows a different idea or theme.
I wondered what I should dedicate my final post to--something that is REALLY important to me.

So, I concluded that I would like to write a message on mothers and fathers.

Why is that my choice?  I did not have any relationship with my own father who died when I was 16 years old.  My relationship with my mother was also complicated due to mental health problems in our family. I am happy to say that she and I finally had a loving relationship in the finals years of her life.  I do look forward to seeing  both of them again someday when I pass from this mortal life...it will be great to see them and renew my relationship with them under different circumstances.


I DO NOT THINK THERE IS ANYTHING THAT I FEEL MORE STRONGLY ABOUT THAN..... THAT OVER TIME MANY PARENTS WILL REGRET THAT THEY DEDICATED MUCH MORE TIME TO THINGS THAT MATTER LESS THAN THEY DID TO THEIR FAMILY AND THEIR CHILDREN WHICH THEY HAVE COME TO REALIZE MATTER MOST.  HOME IS WHERE THE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS HAPPEN.

For me, my own fatherhood and grandfatherhood have been a complex journey.  It is hard to do that which you have never witnessed before. I never saw fatherhood, motherhood, or grandparenthood in my own family.  So when I became a father and grandfather I found myself trying to notice and study how others did it.  But often I was lost in my own weaknesses and personal struggles and I did not rise to the challenge.  I did have some good days, however.  At times I was afraid to try because I did not know what to do. Now I am the father of ten and the grandfather of forty....and I can only observe the fruits of my efforts as a father...sometimes wistfully...sometimes happily.

So, what is my point in all of this?  I do believe, after 45 years of being a father and 40 years as a psychologist and marriage counselor that there is NO CAREER INVESTMENT, NO INVESTMENT IN GETTING BETTER AT GOLF, NO INVESTMENT IN EARNING MORE MONEY, NO INVESTMENT IN OUR OWN RECREATIONAL ACTIVITIES...NO INVESTMENT IN ANY OTHER THNG...THAT WILL EVER MATCH WHATEVER INVESTMENT WE MAKE IN OUR OWN FAMILY AND THE WELL-BEING OF EACH MEMBER OF OUR FAMILY.  SPEAKING FOR MYSELF...I WOULD SAY THAT NOTHING ELSE MATTERS MUCH COMPARED WITH WHAT I MAKE OF MYSELF AS A FATHER.

MOTHERS?  Wow, I just sit back and watch and marvel..and honor each one.  Every time they give birth they literally put their lives on the line for their child and their family.  It is a sacrifice no man will ever fully understand.  I remember when President Ezra Taft Benson, in the 80-s, made a heartfelt petition to mothers to return to the home rather than be in the workplace.  He understood very well that there are many mothers who MUST be in the workplace.  He well understood the marvelous contribution of women in the work of the world.  He was not relegating them to a "role of lesser value in the home"..........He saw the home as the place of greatest value in preparing the next generation...and he knew the mothers had to be there as their gifts were essential in the development of a healthy family.  His request for as many as possible to be home was a compliment of the highest order.
He felt that the day would come when we would all wish we could have been tutored and taught by our mothers.....that home would be a school where mothers taught their children how to be good people, how to be parents, and how to serve others.  Mothers have a special and unique gift in teaching such things as they have a sense of Christlike love and sensitivity that is a great blessing for their families.  But they have to be there to offer that gift. So, I guess we wish "mom" could be everywhere at the same time.  They have the touch of gold.
I greatly admire the wonderful mothers of this world who are charged with providing for their families as well as teaching their families. Their sacrifices are difficult to describe...but we all feel their sacrifices.

WELL, I DO BELIEVE THE ONE THING THAT WILL CHANGE THE WORLD IS WHEN MOTHERS AND FATHERS MAKE BEING MOTHER AND FATHER THE NUMBER ONE VALUE OF THEIR LIVES.  THAT WILL CHANGE THE WORLD MORE THAN ANY OTHER THING.  Have a nice day. Jim